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A quiet renaissance | life update
After going on sick leave for 3 and a half months due to extreme burnout & struggles with my anxiety and depression, I had an “epiphany”, I suppose. Feeling my mind melting inside my hands once again was a brutal reminder of the volatility of… well, everything. The world seems so broken at the moment.…
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Last week, I chopped almost all of my hair off while my anxiety was chewing on my brains. By some miracle, it didn’t turn out too bad, and I even like it 🤪🤪 Another good thing about it is that there isn’t enough hair anymore for me to grab on and chopchopchop when I’m freaking…
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For the first time in a very long time, I can see a future that isn’t a void of absolute darkness.
I’m glad to have survived and to still be alive somehow. And I can see myself living for another long while, too. My future feels precious again. I see open doors, opportunities, passion, and more good days than bad days 🌈 I know more storms will come my way, and I know that I will…
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Looking back & forward | 2022
On my previous blog, I used to write these types of posts monthly to help me look back on the journey so far and focus on what is coming next. There are loads of things that I used to do, but most of them now feel like a distant memory; a forgotten light. Where I…
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She is tired of waiting, too.
These days, I haven’t been there for myself or anybody else. I have been mindlessly roaming–every breath I have taken the last two years has felt like glass shards entering my lungs. A week ago, I was once again lost in a soundproof bubble; the purpose of which I mistakenly thought was to shelter me…
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gravity owns you
The air never fills my lungs completely, most of the time I’m heaving through a hand sewn smile. No one has to know—look through me. Long before this vessel was even made, something was already broken. Wires wouldn’t know to embrace each other, parts couldn’t fit together, and to this day, cannot move freely—They cannot…
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Lightfast grief
I know what forever is, it’s the illusion of Light. Nothing lasts but my heart. There is no tunnel, no end in sight. I will be watching as every beautiful flower — Conduits of love, keepers of Light — Grow weak and wither before my wide eyes. The world fades and I am doomed to…
…where Time is merciless and Light feeds darkness.
The Dawn Chorus… 