Happiness has always felt to me
Like a meaningless thing to chase
Some say it is the place to be
Others that it’s out of this world
I say it is a lie that you sell to a bird
That you have trapped inside a cage.
I have never been a believer
Of Happiness as my saviour
I do not care for deserters
And Happiness only lingers
For a second, it brushes its fingers
Against your heart and without a sound
It quickly leaves and never turns around.
I am not a pessimist, quite the opposite
And I am positive that this Happiness
That you speak of does not exist,
It is but a feeling, and truly fleeting.
I do not need you to fix me,
Show me how to be happy
With the power of a simple smile,
Hugging trees and running miles,
Or do I need to leave the house,
Sunshine therapy and all of that?
I am not broken just because you cannot understand me.
I am not unhappy; I am just not your happy
And I know that there is nothing wrong with me
There is just a different world inside me.
My darkness is only there to shield the fire inside,
Love and protect it like a big sister,
Without it, I’d be as dry as a desert; dry.
It might not look like yours, but it’s still the real thing
It’s warm and shines and fuels my fire
In fact, it burns brighter than most lights I’ve seen
And makes me the happiest I’ve ever been.
This one has been sitting around long enough ! I was waiting for it to be perfect, but lately I have gone back to embracing unfinished works and raw “imperfect” creations. I guess this poem is one of them; not quite there, yet, everything it needs to be.